I've preached so much about it. I still continue to advise others (especially my mom) to do it.. and finally now when I really am supposed to do it, I'm ABSOLUTELY not doing it. There's the fear of the unknown. Of what is going to happen, how it's all going to work out. And now instead of surrendering and being at peace, I'm trying to take it all in my head and figure out things on my own. When I've known to trust and believe for so long, why is it failing me now? I know its a temporary thing and it will pass..even this subconscious lack of surrendering .. but some how my mind chooses a state of nervousness over being at peace. I'd rather be pissed/frustrated/blah than simply remind myself of the power of surrender?? Why? I'm seriously at a loss of words. And it actually amuses me..the way my mind is working. All along I've never let stress get the better of me because when you know you're not the doer and you believe in fate, its a little easy to accept things that happen. (I know many of you probably disagree with that line of thought.. but like many others this post is for me) But now..nope just not happening!
So here's my auto-suggestive psyche boosting note to myself..
Dear me, calm down.. be at ease. All izzz well! :P Surrender. Simply Surrender. You've done it for so long. You can do it again. That is the ONLY thing that can work. You know it. Realize it and be at peace!
Thathasthu!
